Rating 5 out of 5 (Extraordinarily platitudinous)

The primatologist Frans de Waal has discovered that animals can tell right from wrong. He suggests that morality evolved as part of our need to form social bonds and act co-operatively, except in bankers (Tee-Hee - that's just a little joke of mine). He is, of course, completely wrong. What this research does is prove that Hinduism is the right religion after all. He's only spent a few decades doing scientific observation, whereas we've got thousands of years worth of stories, poetic similes and analogies to rely upon. His work proves that the invisible magic bit of yourself can reappear in your pet dog, which is how Fido knows to cower in the corner when he's done a doo-doo on the carpet.

We call this invisible magic bit your Atman. I would call it a "soul", but that doesn't sound mysterious and exotic enough and by giving it a name you haven't heard of before it appears as if I've introduced a new concept or given it some added value. Different species can reveal different amounts of a "soul", or "Atman" as we Vaishnav Hindu teachers and theologians call it. Humans reveal the most Atman, except in bankers (titter). Monkeys don't show nearly as much Atman as humans do, although they do show more than bankers (pfghhhhh....). This is exactly what you would expect if Bhagavad-gita was correct, therefore it is, but then we all knew that anyway. This is what makes Hindus so much better at looking after other people, and indeed other animals (even bankers Ha-ha).

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